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The Worst Country Songs of All Time – Todd’s Top or Bottom Five [VIDEOS]

Toby Keith and his Red Solo Cup
Ethan Miller, Getty Images

Jerrod Niemann’s new song “Donkey” came on the radio recently, and I am not a big fan. It prompted this conversation.  There are a lot of songs I don’t particularly care for, but this was a tough list to make. There have been thousands of country songs since I started in the business over a quarter-century ago.  There have been dozens and dozens of really bad songs, but some stand out above the rest.

No, “Achy Breaky Heart” did not make my list! Also, Taylor Swift did not make my list.  I Know they both have their critics, but I am not one of them. I consider this a fun list and is in no way meant to be mean or malicious toward any of the artists listed.  Here is my top or should I say my “bottom 5″?

5. Queen of My Double Wide Trailer – Sammy Kershaw

I wish Sammy Kershaw still had big hits on the radio. I absolutely love his voice. “Queen of My Double Wide Trailer” is a song I am happy to say we no longer play very much. What a hokey song! A line that comes to mind is, “Dang her black heart and her pretty red neck”. Come on Sammy! You can do better.

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4. Rockin the Beer Gut – Trailer Choir

We had Trailer Choir on the K99 Free stage at the Greeley Stampede a few years ago. They were fantastic. They are wonderful entertainers. I really enjoyed seeing their show. However, their big hit, “Rockin’ The Beer Gut” is not one of the better songs I have ever heard. O.K. It’s a real stinker. It’s a fun novelty song, but just doesn’t hold up.  It was one of the early country rap songs that is starting to get popular in our format, but not one of the better ones. In my opinion, country + rap = crap.

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3. Baby Likes To Rock It – The Tractors

I hated this song from the very 1st time I heard it. I still don’t like it. I didn’t think Steve Ripley could sing then and I still don’t.  (Not that we have heard from them since 1994)  The Tractors were a true one-hit wonder. Although  to this day I can’t understand why this song was ever a hit. I guess some people liked it. It went to #11 on the country charts. Hope I never have to hear it again, but if you want to give it a listen, here it is:

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2. Red Solo Cup – Toby Keith

As badly as I wanted “Red Solo Cup” to be #1 on my list, it fell just short of the worst country song of all time. I have to be honest. From the 1st time I heard it, I wondered how it could possibly become a hit, but it did just that. It was a monster. To me, it sounds like a song that was written by a teenager who broke into their parent’s liquor cabinet before they put pen to paper.

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1. Planet Texas – Kenny Rogers

I love Kenny Rogers. He is my favorite artist of all time. The 1st album I ever bought was “The Gambler”. One of the biggest thrills of my life was the 1st time I ever met Kenny and we shared a microphone for an interview at the Greeley Stampede. That is why it is so ironic that I chose his song “Planet Texas” as the worst country song of all time. I didn’t want it to be Kenny Rogers, but after listening to it again, I had no choice. What an awful song. I really hope Kenny isn’t proud of this one, cuz it’s bad.

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