Shock Collars For Husbands – Brian’s Blog

I am a husband, father, grandfather and broadcaster. My ears are assaulted on a daily basis with music and talk. I have a limited amount of attention to give on any given day so it is crucial that I don't waste my attention on things I don't need to hear. My house is a non-stop noise machine and not all of it is directed at me. I get confused as to whether I was being hollered at or was it the dog or grandson. I have reached the point in life where the only way to survive is to tune out everything and wait until I get hollered at for not listening. I then will tune in because I know it was directed at me.

If I listened every time someone spoke in my house I would get exhausted. I have come up with the perfect communication tool for guys like me...shock collars. I think each member of the family should have a small shock collar on them with a color coded remote control. Each member of the family would have a color on the remote. When you are about to speak, you hit the button for the person who needs to pay attention. The remote would send a little charge through their collar and they would then know to pay attention. This little invention could save family members so much time from listening to unneeded conversations. I am ordering mine today. It will be cheaper than getting pepper sprayed for not paying attention when I am spoken to.