Today is National Get Out of the Doghouse Day. This is when you are supposed to atone for something you have done wrong and get back in our spouses good graces. I am in the doghouse a lot...more than the dog is and that is where my beef lies. I love my dogs and they add a lot of value and joy to life but they also seem to have a different set of standards and rules than I do at home. I want the same freedom and forgiveness that my dogs are afforded.

I am tired of my dogs getting away with everything. They do things on a daily basis that would get any human kicked out of the house. For some reason I always seem to take the blame for the dogs. If one of the dogs leaves a deposit on the floor, it is my fault for not letting them out soon enough. If I let them out and then they come right in and drop a deuce on the carpet it is still my fault because I didn’t stay outside and watch them go to make sure. I cannot win and these little guys know it. They have my wife wrapped around their paws and like to rub it in to me. I get in trouble all the time and end up in the doghouse yet they are always warm and cozy in the house.

I promise you that if I peed on the floor, stole and destroyed property, ran away, had several children out of wedlock that I didn’t take of, was unemployed, hollered and yelled when she came home, got thrown out of obedience school, pooped on the carpet, was brought home by the police and sniffed her mom’s butt, that she would throw me to the curb in a heartbeat. These little devils do all this and get a chewy. I don’t understand. I am going to do a few of these things today and see what happens. It’s gonna be cold in the doghouse tonight. I know I ain't getting out anytime soon after this blog.