Is it Time to Divorce in Colorado — Here’s Your Sign
The good and the bad for Colorado when it comes to divorce lies in the statistics, is it time for you to get a divorce, here's your sign. Check the list and see if you should be throwing in the towel.
Statistically speaking, in Colorado, we are in the top 10 for marriages and the top 20 for divorces. That alone says we are at least doing something right when it comes to marriage in Colorado, yet only at a 50% success rate.
The cool thing about our ancestors is that divorce didn't really seem like it was an option for them. in 1900 the divorce rate, overall in the U.S. was at .07%, by 1981 that figured skyrocketed to 5.3% and in 2009 the divorce rate leveled out to around 3.5%
The why's and how's are really just speculative. Some would say that job rates, the economy and other 'life' factors make the subtle differences from year to year.
IS IT TIME FOR YOU TO GET A DIVORCE IN COLORADO, HERE'S YOUR SIGN:
- Playing the "what if I'd never married my spouse" game, do you find yourself thinking more about a life that might have been than what it is? Usually this is a 'game' you play alone without including your partner; this leaves them in the dark and can lead to a spiraling disaster fast. It's time to communicate and see if you are both on the same page, as he/she could be playing the same game in their head. Now it's time to save it or seriously consider ending it, but you should get to that spot together. A marriage is the only job that doesn't have regular staff meeting's, agenda's or goal's, can't think of a business that could really survive without some kind of accountability regime.
- The bad starts to outweigh the good. This really happens when communication fails and all you see are the negative sides of this relationship and instead of communicating your dislikes, you in turn start building them up like some Lego tree of negativity until that is all that is left. If the good in him/her has left marriage-town, it's time to put your big boy/girl pants on and end the misery or step up to the plate and save it.
- When you try to communicate a concern are you faced with a wall of defense? Does your spouse try to discredit your beliefs, your feelings and concerns? If either one of your are resorting to these tactics, you're on an unmaintained dirt road littered with rocks and pit holes. Once you start driving down this road it's possible that you will not be able to find a clear path and divorce could be in your near future.
- Sex... if you or he wants it and the other doesn't, you've lost that loving feeling. Remember in the beginning? You quite possibly fit the mold of not always wanting it, you wouldn't be alone, but in the first stages of the marriage, you had sex anyway. Now, your level of intimacy may have reached the barely a kiss good night and ignoring the human nature of being intimate in some fashion is a fast track ticket to divorce.
No marriage is perefect and all marriages, unless harmful physically or mentally, deserve a fighting chance. Typically, one will find great results in just talking, share whats inside-everything. If you can't get past it, then you have, not only your sign, you'll have a clear answer. But this is not something that can just be in your head, remember the love, put your understanding gloves on and make a move forward. Whatever the end result, you will have given it the attention and care that it deserves.
Preparing for battle, first spend a few minutes with your wedding book, look at your pictures, look at your smile and into your eyes... bring it back or at least to the table and give love a fighting chance.