I am not a normal person. I hate Spring. The first day of Spring is tomorrow and most people are so excited. They love the smells and sounds of Spring and the warming weather it brings. It makes me sad. It reminds me that Summer is right around the corner and that is the only thing I hate worse than Spring.

I understand the joy this season brings but let me tell you a few of the reasons I cannot stand Spring. It means allergies and I get to hear all of the runny noses and sneeze noises from the general public. It means bugs will be all over the place. It means the birds will return to wake me with their annoying screech and paint my car with the precision car bombing poop brigade. It means it will be light until nearly midnight. I will not get to see a day end until October. I will have to go to bed in the light every night. I hate that. I like to go to bed in the dark. I will feel the need to do stuff. The warm weather and daylight make it so you have to do yard work and clean stuff because it is too nice to just stay in. It means seeing lots of people in bicycle pants..nuff said. It means my deodorant will fail by 1130 am each day and will be a sweaty mess until late September. Enjoy the season. I will be the grumpy guy in the corner counting the days until Fall begins.