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Table Talk: He Doesn’t Like to do the Same Thing’s Anymore!

Relationships are hard work, especially when they start with a little white lie.

Relationships 1
jeanlouis_zimmermann, flickr

Men are amazing creatures and (sorry ladies) we don’t give them enough credit. (sometimes) And I am talking about the right guy, not the guy that treats your poorly almost everyday-by the way its time to leave that relationship. I mean the guy that you know is for you, the one that gets mad, (hey we’re all human) the one that is there with you through it all-good and bad period!

So the complaint today is that he doesn’t like doing the same things anymore. I suspect he really didn’t like doing them from the beginning. It’s not a deception, its a little white lie to get into your good graces, to have the chance to show you who he can be with you. I agree he should not have done that. He should have let his aura speak for itself, but life has shown us from time to time that we have to fudge the truth to be seen. After all, when it is all said and done we can come clean. What’s the saying? ” better to beg for forgiveness than ask for permission”?! With that said, what do you do today?

When you discover that your guy doesn’t quite like to do the same things as you do, don’t panic. I have seen far too many couples throw in the towel from this frustration. Hang tight, there is a solution, if you’re willing. When it comes to things he doesn’t like to do, do them by yourself or with friends and family. If you’re like me, there are few things that I like to do alone and even fewer things that I like to do without him. But it happens, he looks at me and gives me that look-its very similar to the puppy tilted head look and then there’s something piercing with his lips and I know. I know that he doesn’t want to go. I can’t say in the beginning I was very mature when this happened… I would pout… maybe get mad and maybe cry. In the end, I am the only one that lost out-I didn’t go to the event. I’m not saying that this is any surprise, but I can be quite the princess. Through the years I have learned to pick my battles, if its a wedding of a mutual friend, like wedding’s or not, I want him there and will make that known. If its a trip to old town to use my seize the deal coupon, well ya, he doesn’t need to go.

Compromise is the saving grace of all unions. And when you are establishing a relationship that’s when its time for you to decide how far you are willing to go down compromise lane. Compromising is not to surrender who you are, nor is it to give up everything you believe. Compromise is an understanding between two people who care for one another. Its the ultimate give and take. If you give a bit more than your partner that is okay, if that is the level of compromise that is comfortable then there is nothing wrong with it. Many will look at your relationship and judge that you may give too much or take too much, its your relationship and if you two are happy that is all that matters. Now there are times when the compromise gets out of hand and you are always giving and not seeing much of a return in time, love or tenderness-this is when the union has taken a wrong turn and you either need to have the talk or bale all together. This compromise story should never be as much as a 90/10 or anything really under a 60/40.

At the end of the day remember what matters most, you love him. If he doesn’t want to go shopping or to your mothers, so be it. Have fun rediscovering you.

 

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