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Let’s Pass Some Laws That Will Make Everyone Happy, Like Mandatory Snow Days

While some will stand in lines waiting for ammo at the crack of dawn when our forefathers stood in line for a loaf of bread and yet others will complain about freedoms and rights being squashed; forgetting what pains it took to get those freedoms and rights and who fought for them… I propose laws that bring smiles, not prejudice, ignorance and disrespect.

Passing Laws
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Okay, first thing is first, if by any chance in the world that Mr. St Germain saw my opening paragraph or goodness forbid Ms. Swenson, I know, I know… it is flawed… but sometimes when you right with passion, you just have to let the pen flow. (my Chaska High School Speech and Comp teachers that were tough on me)

LAWS THAT WILL MAKE EVERYONE HAPPY:

  • Mandatory Snow Days (8″ or More): seriously, who ever wants to do much on a snow day, least of all get dressed and drive in it. For the adults its time away from it all, we didn’t have time to plan anything (like most days off where we are doing laundry and blah work) so on snow days we can stay in our jammies and snack all day while watching crappy daytime tv and sit there in awe that people actually watch this stuff.
  • The Social Media Keyboard Zapper: There should be a law that when somebody whines for the third time in one day about the weather, politics, girlfriends and boyfriends the enter button on your keyboard will zap you.
  • The Bumper Fender Law: Vehicle manufacturers should start making vehicles with bumpers on the fenders (so no one or car gets hurt) and when a car that fully understands that the lane its in will end and they need to merge waits till he is going to run into the cones unless you slow or stop to let him in, you should be able to bump him a little bump nudge like at the bumper cars at an amusement park. This bumper idea could work for a few other things, but only on roadways with speed limits between 25-35… maybe 40, we would have to investigate and test it out once the cars are built.
  • The Butter, Fried Foods and Carbohydrate Law: These things are too tasty to be bad for you, so I propose that we officially ban the fact that they are bad and pass a law saying that they are all good for us, or at least will not clog our arteries and give us big butts.
  • The Avocado Law: If you’re gonna get us all excited about the Avocado sale don’t just put Avocado’s on sale that are too hard to use or all old and smushy. Yes, we appreciate not paying $1.59 each for them and yes, we can let the under rip ones ripen in a couple of days on the counter, but when we see them on sale we go nuts thinking about how we are going to eat them only to find out once we get to the store that they really aren’t edible today or ever.
  • The Mandatory Neighborhood Snow Plow Law: There have been times that I have gotten stuck in my circle or looked outside and canceled appointments because its so bad outside only to find out that once you get past my neighborhood the roads are clear. And everyone thinks that I’m a drama queen because I canceled due to the snow. But hey, there’s the beltways on the other side of the subdivision that get maintained that I never get to see or enjoy, and the ponds and don’t forget the annual picnic (which is fun), but can we please get a snow plow!

What laws would make you happy? Let me know in the comment section. And thank you for playing along!

 

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